For this activity I had to pretend that i got lost at The Lewis Pass Scenic Reserve. I really enjoy writing that is why this has been my funnest activity. It let my imagination run wild and it was fun to do.
I am a Year 8 student at Panmure Bridge School in Auckland, NZ. I am in Learning Space 2 and my teachers are Ms Kirkpatrick and Mrs Anderson.
Saturday, 8 July 2017
Getting lost In The Lewis Pass Scenic Reserve - narrative
I hiked through the lush green forest of Lewis Pass reserve. Grey patches start invading the blue sky above. The chuckles that followed me became softer as I was carried by the wind. I turned around and my friends weren't in sight. My throat was drying up and my lips started to feel parched. Evening feel so fast and a blue spotted blanket was rolled across the sky. Dawn cracked like an egg and then I was awoken by the sound of rustling by the Autumn leaf carpet. I ran towards the sound then I saw my group of friends. "I'm SAVED!!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
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Hey Jeremiah, I like you short story. It sounds astounding. The ending of your story is really awesome. I like your title of your short story. Keep up the great work Jeremiah!
ReplyDeleteHi Jeremiah!
ReplyDeleteYour short description about how you would feel, see, and do if you got lost was very detailed. I loved the intro to your description. I can just imagine it happening as I read it, it is amazingly detailed. Keep up that great posts!
Hi Jeremiah. They story you have wrote is really great. You have one spelling mistake. Other than that you did great. Keep up the great work.
ReplyDeleteHey Jeremiah
ReplyDeleteThe story you wrote is amazing. The best part (In my opinion) was when you wrote 'Dawn cracked like an egg and then I was awoken by the sound of rustling by the autumn leaf carpet' - great use of a simile! Well done.
Daniel
Hello Jeremiah, you have written a wonderful story. You have used all different types of punctuation and that made it sound more interesting. I found a mistake so remember to proof read your work before you publish it on your blog. My favourite part in your story was 'Grey patches start invading the blue sky above'. Keep up the amazing work.
ReplyDeleteHi Jeremiah!
ReplyDeleteThis is a really creative story! Nice job! I especially liked the use of all your adjectives to make your story more interesting...
Well done!
Nicky :)
Hi Jeremiah,
ReplyDeleteI like your story it sounds really cool. Great work on completing this activity.
Eric